I came across a quote earlier this week and haven’t been able to get it out of my head.
It was really simple. A basic black and white close-up of a little boy’s face, with the following overlaid on top:
They’re not giving you a hard time
They’re having a hard time
So simple and so basic, it completely stopped me in my tracks.
Because it made me realize that when my kids are “giving” me a hard time, in those moments I want to scream/run away/poke my eyes out, feeling *this close* to totally losing it — I’m not thinking about them.
I’m only thinking about me.
How annoyed I am.
How frustrated I am.
How much easier life would be for ME if I didn’t have to deal with x, y, z…
Not even considering for one second that they might not be feeling so hot themselves.
That they might be stressed or disappointed or frustrated or annoyed.
That they might be having a hard time.
And that they need me.
Not to correct or discipline or “fix,” but to empathize, listen and guide.
To help them through their hard time.
Rather than making it mine.
ps. This week’s new vid focuses on exactly this as it relates to our kids’ lying. Why they lie, including tips on how to deal in the moment, plus specific tools you can use moving forward to lessen the number of times you catch your kids with their pants on fire 😉
I also whipped up an infographic covering all the tips shared in the vid, so if that’s more your style you can download your free copy via our Parenting Resource Library!